10 Clues You Have An Inadequate Self Esteem

1. Your childhood was marked by a) Parental Abuse, b) Parental Neglect, 3) Parental Ignorance, or 4) Parents with Overbearing Authority.

2. You are afraid of opening up, being real and being vulnerable with your spouse or significant others.

3. You get discouraged easily.

4. You lack self-confidence, especially in decision making.

5. You have difficulty admitting you are wrong, and you always need to be right. Plus, you have trouble forgiving injustices by others.

6. You are a driven, focused person.

7. You are negative and critical of others.

8. You are negative and critical of yourself.

9. You are a perfectionist, that is, you have an unrealistic set of expectations regarding self and others.

10. You indulge in escapism. An excessive use of fantasy activities that keep you from resolving conflicts in the real world.


Courtesy of Sheepfold Ministries, Sharon, PA
Pastor Phil Roland – 2005

L O W   S E L F - E S T E E M

Persons With Poor Self Esteem Tend To:

1. Come from troubled, repressed, or dysfunctional families.
2. Deny their family was troubled, repressed or dysfunctional.
3. Blame themselves for everything.
4. Pick on themselves for everything, including the way they think, feel, look, act or behave.
5. Get angry, defensive, self-righteous, and indignant when others blame and criticize them----something "Low Self-Esteem" persons do to themselves.
6. Reject compliments or praise.
7. Get depressed from a lack of compliments and praise.
8. Feel different than the rest of the world.
10. Think they're not quite good enough.
11. Feel guilty about spending money on themselves or doing unnecessary or fun things for themselves.
12. Fear rejection.
13. Take things personally.
14. Have been victims of sexual, physical, or emotional abuse, abandonment, neglect, or alcoholism.
15. Feel like a victim.
16. Tell themselves they can't do anything right.
17. Be afraid of making mistakes.
18. Wonder why they have a tough time making decisions.
19. Expect themselves to do everything perfectly.
20. Wonder why they can't get anything done to their satisfaction.
21. Have a lot of "shoulds."
22. Feel a lot of guilt.
23. Feel ashamed of who they are.
24. Think their lives aren't worth living.
25. Try to help other people live their lives instead.
26. Get artificial feelings of self-worth from helping others.
27. Get strong feelings of low self worth - embarrassment, failure – from other people's failures and problems.
28. Wish good things would happen to them.
29. Believe good things will never happen to them.
30. Believe they don't deserve good things and happiness.
31. Wish other people would like and love them.
32. Believe other people couldn't possibly like and love them.
33. Try to prove they're good enough for other people.
34. Settle for being needed.

Courtesy of Sheepfold Ministries, Sharon, PA.
Pastor Phil Rolan


Psychology says we must learn to love ourselves. In reality we must learn to love what Jesus loves about us. John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world. . .” How much did God love the world and you and I that are in it? He loved us enough to send His Son to bleed and die for us.
In this world a person or object’s value is determined by its purchased price. We are deemed of inestimable value because the price of our salvation is the Blood of Jesus Christ. “Self-In-Christ-Esteem” is realizing how valuable we are and learning to love what Jesus loves about us.
Mankind’s basic problem is that we don’t love ourselves. If we are honest about it, we struggle even to like ourselves. The Bible contains numerous statements about our identity. Those statements declare who we are and our reasons for liking and loving ourselves.
Our family of origin has told us who we are. They have assigned to us an identity and roles for us to play. Maybe these roles have helped us at the time they were assigned to us, but as we age we outgrow these roles. You know the roles I am talking about. i.e. “The Weak One,” “The Strong Brother/Sister,” “The Family Hero or Star,” “The Black Sheep,” “The Family Clown”
Those roles carry an awful script. Listen to some of the lies we were told. “You’ll never amount to anything!” “You’re such a loser!” “You don’t deserve anything nice in this life!” “You don’t matter!” “Why can’t you be like you’re brother/sister?” It’s time to start confessing who we are in Christ. It’s also time to put away childish things from our past that no longer work for us. It’s time to start loving what Jesus has found loveable.
I AM A Child of God (Romans 8:16)
I AM Redeemed from the Hand of the Enemy (Psalms 107:2)
I AM Forgiven (Colossians 1:13,14)
I AM Saved by Grace through Faith (Ephesians 2:8)
I AM Justified (Romans 5:1)
I AM Sanctified (1 Corinthians 5:17)
I AM A New Creature (2 Corinthians 5:17)
I AM Partaker of His Divine Nature (2 Peter 1:4)
I AM Redeemed from the Curse of the Law (Galatians 3:13)
I AM Delivered from the Powers of Darkness (Colossians 1:13)

Courtesy of Sheepfold Ministries – Pastor Phil Roland - 2005

I AM. . .

1. A Child of God (Romans 8:16)
2. Redeemed from the Hand of the Enemy (Psalms 107:2)
3. Forgiven (Colossians 1:13,14)
4. Saved by Grace through Faith (Ephesians 2:8)
5. Justified (Romans 5:1)
6. Sanctified (1 Corinthians 5:17)
7. A New Creature (2 Corinthians 5:17)
8. Partaker of His Divine Nature (2 Peter 1:4)
9. Redeemed from the Curse of the Law (Galatians 3:13)
10. Delivered from the Powers of Darkness (Colossians 1:13)
11. Led by the Spirit of God (Romans 8:14)
12. A Son of God (Romans 8:14)
13. Kept in Safety Wherever I Go (Psalms 91:11)
14. Getting All My Needs Met by Jesus (Philippians 4:19)
15. Casting All My Cares on Jesus (Peter 5:7)
16. Strong in the Lord and in the Power of His Might (Ephesians 6:10)
17. Doing All Things through Christ Who Strengthens Me (Philippians 4:13)
18. An Heir of God and a Joint Heir with Jesus (Romans 8:17)
19. Heir to the Blessings of Abraham (Galatians 3:13,14)
20. Observing and Doing the Lord's Commandments (Deuteronomy 28:12)
21. Blessed Coming in and Blessed Going out (Deuteronomy 28:6)
22. An Heir of Eternal Life (1 John 5:11,12)
23. Blessed with All Spiritual Blessings (Ephesians 13)
24. Healed by His Stripes (1 Peter 2:24)
25. Exercising My Authority over the Enemy (Luke 10:19)
26. Above Only and Not Beneath (Deuteronomy 28:13)
27. More than a Conqueror (Romans 8:37)
28. Establishing God's Word Here on Earth (Matthew 16:19)
29. An Over-comer by the Blood of the Lamb and the Word of My Testimony (Revelation 12:11)
30. Daily Overcoming the Devil (I John 4:4)
31. Not Moved by What I See (2 Corinthians 4:18)
32. Walking by Faith and Not by Sight (2 Corinthians 5:7)
33. Casting Down Vain Imaginations (11 Corinthians 10:4,5)
34. Bringing Every Thought into Captivity (2 Corinthians 10:5)
35. Being Transformed by Renewing My Mind (Romans 12:1,2)
36. A Laborer Together with God (1 Corinthians 5:21)
37. The Righteousness of God in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:21)
38. An Imitator of Jesus (Ephesians 5:1)
39. The Light of the World (Matthew 5:74)
40. Blessing the Lord at All Times and Continually Praising the Lord with My Mouth (Psalm 34:1)

Say these faith affirmation statements aloud as a way of exhorting yourself.

Courtesy of Sheepfold Ministries, Sharon, PA - Pastor Phil Roland


For all the negative things we have to say to ourselves,
God has a positive answer for it.

You say, "It's impossible."God says: "All thing are possible." (Luke 18:27)

You say, "I'm too tired."God says: "I will give you rest." (Matt 11:28-20)

You say, "Nobody really loves me."God says: "I love you." (John 3:16 John 13:34)

You say, "I can't go on."God says: "My grace is sufficient." (II Cor. 12:9 - Psalm 91:15)

You say, "I can't figure things out."God says: "I will direct your steps." (Proverbs 3:5-6)

You say, "I can't do it."God says: "You can do all things in Me." (Phil 4:13)

You say, "It's not worth it."God says: "It will be worth it." (Romans 8:28)

You say, "I can't forgive myself."God says: "I forgive you." (I John 1:9 - Romans 8:1)

You say, "I can't manage."God says: "I will supply all your needs." (Phil 4:19)

You say, "I'm afraid."God says: "I have not given you a spirit of fear." (II Tim. :7)You say, "I'm always worried and frustrated."God says: "Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)You say, "I don't have enough faith."God says: "I've given everyone a measure of faith." (Romans 12:3)You say, "I'm not smart enough."God says: "I give you wisdom." (I Cor. 1:30)You say, "I feel all alone."God says: "I will never leave you or forsake you." (Heb. 13:5)

Courtesy of Sheepfold Ministries, Sharon, PA 16146, Pastor Phil Roland