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ASSERTIVENESS

RATHUS ASSERTIVENESS SCHEDULE

IDEAS TO KEEP IN MIND

 

 

DIRECTIONS:   Indicate how characteristic or descriptive each of the following statements is of you by using the code given below.

+3 Always                      -1 Once in a great while

+2 Usually                     -2 Rarely

+1 Sometimes                -3 Never

 

1.  I seem to be more aggressive and assertive than most people.

2.  I rarely hesitate to make or accept dates because of

“shyness.”

3.  When the food served at a restaurant is not done to my satisfaction, I complain about it to the waitress or waiter.

4.  I don't care if I hurt other people's feelings when I feel I have been injured.

5.  If a salesman has gone to considerable trouble to show me merchandise which is not quite suitable, I still find it easy to say “No.”

6.  When I am asked to do something, I insist upon knowing why.

7.  There are times when I look for a good, vigorous argument.

8.  I strive to get ahead as well as most people in my position.

9.  To be honest, people rarely take advantage of me.

10. I enjoy starting conversations with new acquaintances and

strangers.

11. I find it easy to talk to attractive persons of the opposite sex.

12. I don't hesitate to make phone calls to business establishments and institutions.

13. If I were applying for a job or for admission to college I would go for an interview rather than write a letter.

14. I can return merchandise without being embarrassed.

15. If a close and respected relative were annoying me, I would

express my annoyance rather than smother my feelings.

16. I ask questions without being afraid of sounding stupid.

17. During an argument I usually control myself.

18. If a famed and respected lecturer makes a statement I think is incorrect, I will have the audience hear my point of view as well.

19. I will argue over prices with clerks and salesmen.

20. When I have done something important or worthwhile, I manage to let others know about it.

21. I am open and frank about my feelings.

22. If someone has been spreading false and bad stories about me, I see him/her as soon as possible to have a “talk” about it.

23. I find it easy to say “No.”

24. I would rather make a scene than bottle up my emotions.

25. I complain about poor service in a restaurant and elsewhere.

26. When I am give a complement, I know how to handle it and what to say.

27. If a couple near me in a theater or at a lecture were conver-sing rather loudly, I would ask them to be quiet or to take         their conversation elsewhere.

28. Anyone attempting to push ahead of me in a line is in for a good battle.

29. 1 am quick to express an opinion.

30. There aren't many times when I don't know what to say.

 

SCORING: Add all the “+” responses.  Add all the “-“ responses. Subtract the two totals to find your score. Your score will range between -90 and +90.

 

SCORE

-90 to -20               Very Non-Assertive

-20 to    0               Situationally Non-Assertive

 0  to  +20              Somewhat Assertive

+20  to  +40           Assertive

+40  to  +90           Probably Aggressive

 

 

Courtesy of Pastor Phil Roland, Sheepfold Ministries, 724-981-5683

 

 

ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOR:

IDEAS TO KEEP IN MIND

 

1.  Assertive behavior is often confused with aggressive behavior. Assertion does not involve hurting the other person physically or emotionally.  The must be no intent to harm.

2.  Assertive behavior aims at equalizing the balance of power, not “winning the battle” by putting down the other person or rendering her/him helpless.

3.  Assertive behavior involves expressing your legitimate rights as an individual.  You have a right to express your own wants, needs, feelings and ideas.

4.  Remember, other individuals have a right to respond to your assertiveness with their own wants, needs, feelings and ideas.

5.  An assertive encounter with another individual may involve negotiating an agreeable compromise.

6.  By behaving assertively, you open the way for honest relationships with others.

7.  Assertive behavior not only is concerned with what you say, but how you say it.

8.  Assertive words accompanied by appropriate assertive “body language” makes your message clear and with more impact.

9.  Assertive body language includes the following:

          a) Maintaining direct eye contact

          b) Maintaining an erect posture

          c) Speaking clearly and audibly

          d) Making sure you do not have a “whiney” quality to your                  voice

          e) Using facial expression and gestures to add emphasis to                  your words

10) Assertive behavior is a skill that can be learned and maintained by frequent practice.

 

Courtesy of Pastor Phil Roland, Sheepfold Ministries, 724-981-5683